5 Ways To Deal With Difficult People!

May 5, 2023 (updated)

5 ways to deal with difficult people

People are going to be people and you will encounter some that deliberately attempt to get under your skin. So what do you do in those types of situations? It can be very draining especially if you are trying your hardest to have a drama free and stress free kind of day! Luckily I have some quick tips on what you can do to deal with even the most challenging personalities. The fact of the matter is that you cannot change others but you can change how you react to them, and that is what is going to get you past that level of irritation. It is a mindset so when you shift gears, you will be shocked at how it will completely change how you begin to respond to the same circumstances as before!

Pray for them:

When you are deliberate about praying, it is astonishing what the power of Prayer can do! The bottom line is a person’s attitude and behavior is outside of your control, but one thing you can do is pray that their demeanor will alter from negative to positive. You will begin to see that same person with that horrible disposition begin to actually be friendly and pleasant. It will not work overnight so you have to be purposeful with your prayers and let them truly come from the heart.

The Word of God says in Luke 6:27-28 “But I say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.” We can clearly see that the Lord is commanding us to love our enemies. The fact of the matter is that we have no idea what people are going through that is causing them to act in such a hateful manner.

Life is completely spiritually and if you can approach it from that lens, you will have a better understanding of how to handle difficult people. It is certainly easier said than done particularly if the person is just downright nasty in how they treat you. Don’t get discouraged because if you are genuine with your prayers, you will see them start to come to fruition. Just don’t give up!

Choose what you respond to:

Not everything deserves a response. When you learn to hold back before you react, it will save you from wasting even a second of your day over irrelevant situations. It will take some effort to adjust especially if you are the type to clap back at every offensive word and every harmful comment tossed in your direction. Learn to just brush off the hate. It takes so much more energy to retaliate than to just let it go.

You have to remember that the enemy will use the people around you to get you to develop negative emotions. He knows that if you are agitated enough your agitation will turn into anger, then bitterness, hate, and then eventually unforgiveness. These adverse feelings are open doorways for the enemy to come into your life and create chaos. It is never worth the repercussions that you will have to endure. Be cautious about what you are responding to.

Another thing you can do is take a second to outweigh the pros versus the cons; is their remark really worth any of your valuable time? Nine times out of ten it is not! The Word of God tells us in Ephesians 4:26-27, “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.” The word place being used in these passages means opportunity. In other words do not give the enemy any opportunity to come into your life to wreak havoc. Allowing yourself to get upset and angry with someone for a long period of time will do just that!

Bite your tongue:

Silence is such a strong weapon when used properly! You will be amazed at how the person on the other end responds when you choose to bite your tongue instead of retaliating with your words. Often times, the animosity, the malice, and the unfavorable behavior being displayed are done to get a rise out of you. The goal is to see if they can get you to react and more times than we would like to admit, it works!

As Christians we have a microscope on us 24/7 because the people around you want to see how you will react in certain circumstances. It is our responsibility to shine the light of Jesus Christ in every situation regardless of how difficult it might be. You can literally ruin your witness by saying something that is contrary to the characteristic of a believer of Christ. Why should they get saved if a Christian acts just like the world? Retaliate by showing them love and it will completely change how they view you.

Biting your tongue and choosing to say nothing back takes so much courage and strength but it makes you the bigger person in the end. It shows class, grace, and overall restraint which will demonstrate the amount of integrity that you truly possess. A spiritually mature person will understand the value of biting their tongue. Remember when in doubt, silence it out!

I have other articles that go into detail about the importance of taming your tongue: The Power of Your To ngue, Proverb Scriptures that will Help You Tame Your Tongue!, and The Spiritual Laws of God-The Power of Your Tongue.

Pick your battles wisely:

A battle is always going to cause conflict and tension that is why selecting them wisely is the key when interacting with complicated people. Nine times out of ten, the argument isn’t even worth the amount of strength it takes to fight back. Always ask yourself this question: Is what I am disagreeing about going to affect me one year down the line? If the answer is no, just don’t even engage with the hostility waiting to take place.

It’s unavoidable, some folks just want to bump heads with everyone that they possibly can at any given time, it’s what drives them. That is why choosing your battles carefully are so very important. Know the personalities that are around you so that when you come into contact with a difficult one; you already know what to do to avoid any unfriendly conversation by any means necessary. Do not fall victim to the enemy’s schemes.

One way that you can gauge whether or not a battle is really worth fighting is you can ask yourself this question: Is what I am fighting for going to affect me a year down the line? If not, you might want to reconsider whether or not you really want to go there. Especially if who you are coming into conflict with is a family member or friend. Words have long-lasting effects and once they come out of your mouth you can no longer take them back.

Know your character:

No matter how hard you may try to escape from it, you will encounter people in your life that are hard to deal with. Knowing your character will allow you to determine how to take control of your emotions when it happens. Understanding your limits is key in helping you establish when to remove yourself from the situation altogether. When you have that realization that you are way too mature to get involved in another person’s mess, it will prevent you from making the mistake of being compelled to react to it.

Find ways to keep that level of peacefulness and tranquility when you need to. It can be taking deep breaths in and out until you compose yourself, it may be taking time out every morning to meditate on scripture, or it can be as simple as counting to ten. Whatever that peaceful place is for you, make sure that it is easily accessible. Most importantly hold yourself to a high standard which includes remaining tasteful, polished, and sophisticated in everything that you do!

As you grow in Christ your spiritual maturity should grow as well. You should no longer allow the things that bothered you a year ago bother you now. It really boils down to the renewal of your mind. If you are spending time in the Word of God and allowing the Holy Spirit to lead and guide you in everything that you do, you should begin to see significant changes in your character. Be that light in the midst of darkness all day and every day!

Conclusion

No matter what, you are going to come across difficult people in your life there is just no way of getting around it. The question is: how are you handling those situations when they occur? The Word of God is significantly clear on this matter. We are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves and that includes our enemies.

We are the Lord’s representatives here on Earth meant to share His love and shine His light. That is why He holds His children to such a high standard. We have to keep His mission in our hearts at all times. That mission is to bring as many people to the knowledge of Jesus Christ as we possibly can. That consist of even the difficult people that you encounter.

Also, don’t forget to check out my other blogs:

How to Share Your Testimony

The Importance of Renewing Your Mind!

The Spiritual Laws of God-Poverty Part 1

The Spiritual Laws of God-Poverty Part 2

The Spiritual Laws of God-Restoration

The Spiritual Laws of God-The General Principles

The Spiritual Laws of God-The Power of Your Tongue!

The Spiritual Laws of God-Having an Understanding

If you’ve missed any of the other weekly quotes, no worries I am listing them down below:

Positive Quote for the Week: Be You!

Positive Quote for the Week: Accept Your Imperfections